the science of bussology...
have you eveer waited for the bus for SOOO LOOONG that it felt as if you were waiting for the sky to fall? or that you were waiting for Christopher Columbus and Mel Gibson to lock lips right in front of you? According to this newly discoevered science of bussology, if the above has indeed happened to you, it only means one thing: that further down along the line, I'm waiting for the same bus that you're gonna be taking.
My luck with buses is truly AMAZING. Its as if one of my ancestors set fire to an innocent bus and now the predecessors of the above mentioned bus bear a grudge against me and have sworn to carry out the long lasting venedetta against me and my kind. Here's an exaample... today i wanted to take bus 200 to get back to my room. in the time that it took for my ONE bus to come, 2 bus 74s went past, 2 bus 105s went by, 2 95s went by, 3 106s went by and FIVE 111s went by. According to the time sheet, the buses leave the terminal at an interval of 20 mins, but... i waited there for 40 mins to get the bus. here's another example. To get from Fong Seng to my room, i can take SEVEN buses. Not too long ago, i waited for about 10 mins for any ONE of the SEVEN, but none came, so i decided to walk the 2 busstops distance to the stop outside my room. Just as i reached the stop i was supposed to get off (on foot) FOUR of the seven buses appeared, ALL AT THE SAME TIME.
I am so lucky with buses, i can almost predict to the exact moment when the bus will appear, exactly when the bus is JUST out of running ability. like when i'm crossing a 6 lane road. Or when i'm waiting for the green light to turn red so i can cross the road. Or when i'm in the middle of crossing an overhead bridge. Or i when i'm switching buses i get off the bus i'm on BEHIND the next one i'm supposed to take. Fantastic.
But... look on the bright side, at least now you know when you're gonna meet me. :) see you the next time you wait a long time for the bus!
Thursday, August 31, 2006
FARTED @ 11:50 PM
new blogskin!!!!
whoo hoo!!! did up a brand new blogskin on my brand new photoshop!!! ok, its got certain resident features, like the fat guy pinching his tummy on the left (this guys the epitome of this blogs motto, "feel the fat"). i dunno how it looks on IE or firefox, but it looks great on MAC. So... if there's a prob on IE or firefox, lemme know, i'll see what i can do about it. :)
like it? no?
then too bad
FARTED @ 5:16 PM
my fridge...
today i had a delicious plate of rice with teriyaki chicken and puke on the side. why do i call this delectable dish puke? cos that's what it looks like. Ok, maybe it does actually mildly resemble cucumbers and some vegetables, but to my trained eye, it looks like the curd that's been eaten by a cow only to be regurgitated and eaten again. Look at those little brown things that accompany the main dish!!! looks like boogers. Look at the juice that's dripping off the cucumber (or whatever that thing is)!!! Kinda reminds me of bile. Remember kids, if it looks like puke, smells like puke and feels like puke, it probably is. this was from sumo house, supposedly the cheapest japanese restaurant in Singapore (katsudon for $2.90). Since they opearate on such a low budget, i suppose the puke is forgivable. Maybe they couldnt afford the vinegar needed to pickle vegetables so they used the hydrochloric acid and bile that is readily available in the chef's tummy to do the job. I'm sure by now you're wondering, what does puke in a dish look like? just scroll down. This little dish was so tantalizing, i decided i couldnt bear to eat it myself, so i left it there for the next customer (i think that was how it came to me in the first place).
WOW! looks so yummy! I'm sure all of you out there are thinking, "WHERE CAN I GET SUCH A LOVELY LOOKING DISH?!?!?!?!?" alright, if you insist, i'll tell you. Those of you in NUS are lucky because this aromatic pile of booger and bile is available RIGHT IN CLEMENTI!!! Its just beside the Kshop-in/NTUC/toilet. and don't worry, puke is always in ready supply, so dont worry, just head down anytime to get your own plate to tittilate your palates.
After that, me and baby went shopping and... this is the end result. (drumroll) my fridge!!!
ok, i'm not trying to show off my photoshop skill (which i must say is pretty darn AMAZING) but check out the goodies in my fridge!!! whoo hoo!!! i'll show all of you the goodies in the food section sometime soon. i'm gonna get fatter, if not... how can i maintain this blog right? :)
FARTED @ 12:50 AM
Midnite 7s!!!!
just went for baby's midnite 7s thing over the weekend. it was damn fun! i'm not much of a fan of rugby but watching ppl crashing into each other was GREAT! Apparently its the first rugby event in ASIA to play rugby thru midnight too. cool. :)
and... there's a culture of sportsmanship in rugby that i find truly admirable. Like making a tunnel for the opponents to pass thru at the end of a game then the opponents doing it too. Take a look at rugby. It's actually in the rule book that "you must be violent to play" (Chap35, Sec 3, Line 2 of The Dean's rugby guide). Players slam each other on the ground, tear at each others shirts, punch each other, kick each other, slam chairs into each other, shoot each other with guns and grenades, and they STILL shake hands after the game and toast each other at the post event party. Real nice. :)
That brings me to my next point. the BEER. there's ALWAYS beer at a rugby event. it's as if ruggers get inspired when they think of the beers they're gonna down after the game. Why dont i get beer at my events? damn. I should introduce this to soccer...
Anyway, the midnite 7s was cool. My baby did a MEGA tackle that i felt damn proud of. :) (but she got a mega baluku for it too) GO BABY!!! muak. :)
Midnite 7s was a GREAT event even for a tubby non-rugger like me. to everyone out there, check it out next year!
Monday, August 28, 2006
FARTED @ 10:55 PM
guess what i bought today?
Who can guess what i bought today?
nope i didnt buy a new pair of specs. ADOBE PHOTOSHOP!!!! oh man, it is DAMN easy to use. but... i gotta work on my phototaking skill, i cut off my brain in that pic.
Friday, August 25, 2006
FARTED @ 11:33 PM
searching for humanity...
As most of you know, i'm stuck in engng. Today i found out, most of my engineering peers are actually... ALIENS. For example, there i was sitting on the benches in front of my LT waiting for the lect to start then this guy comes dancing in and does taichi right in front of me. He thinks his deceptiveness can fool me... i know what he's doing, he's no doing taichi, he's sending out signals to his alien spaceship. Then... there's this other guy, couldn't really pinpoint his race (alien camouflage isnt that great yet) who was talking to his computer. Yet again, i was too sharp, his computer is actually his superior and he's getting instructions from it. The language he was speaking in was pretty alien too. i looked a little longer, looking for the bluetooth or handphones but... there were none. he was REALLY TALKING TO HIS COMPUTER. i dont think its a universal problem, this only applies to engng. And its understandable, because when i look at my profs, then it dawns upon me, that now i know who the head aliens are...
I'm scared...
FARTED @ 1:46 PM
NEWS!!! this just in...
We interrupt all regular blogging to inform everyone of this ground breaking news. This just in... my lecturer is crazy. Prof Lin lost his nuts during todays lecture and was absolutely delirious. During the lecture, Prof Lin told an extremely funny joke, and burst out laughing on his own, despite the fact that no1 in class was laughing. Is something wrong prof? His joke was, "if i live in the west and there's a fire on jurong island, the fire would engulf everything there." and he burst out laughing. When this reporter interviewed several members of the class, they mentioned their fright and awe to see the hysterics of their lecturer. "he's evil!" said one of the more religious students. "he's crazy!" said one of th more naive students. "What the fuck?!?!?" said the guy next to me. Everyone is in chaos after his last comment. The class is sending out a plea to anyone who can help understand the situation to please contact them.
Thursday, August 24, 2006
FARTED @ 2:48 PM
who wants clothes?!?!?!
dear everyone in singapore,
I WANNA BUY SOME STUFF FROM THE STATES!!! but.. shipping is madness. it more than doubles the price of the stuff i want to buy. BUT... if more of us buy together, shipping will be GREATLY reduced. So who wants stuff? the stuff here is kinda nice, they've got ALOT of stuff too. so... go take a look, if any1 wants, get back to me and i'll place mass orders. e-mail me at ajc_drnopantz@yahoo.com if you do (copy the link from the webby so i know what it is you want). Check it
out !!!
check out the clearance section for cheaper stuffs. the more people who buy, the less the shipping charges are. so buy buy buy!!!!
Deadline: 15 september
Wednesday, August 23, 2006
FARTED @ 10:01 PM
?!?!??!?!?
what just happened?!?!?!?
FARTED @ 6:21 AM
why so IRRITATING?!?!?!
To all Seniors out there...
i KNOW you are facing this problem, especially those of you who stay in hall... i'm sure you are all wondering... WHY THE HELL ARE THE FRESHIES SO GODDAMNED IRRITATING?!?!?!?!? i have NO idea why, but all freshies, especially those who stay in hall, actually feel that they have to prove something. So... they come in with all their shit-assed ideas and try to make the hall a "better place" with their revolutionary new ideas and flare. all i have to say is... FUCK YOU and your ideas. I dont give a shit.
Another thing i've noticed, is that i can tell a freshie from a senior INSTANTLY. how can i do this? do i have some inate ability to detect freshies just by walking past them? no, its because i can detect a wayang king from 2 km away. and it seems to me... that a large majority of frreshies (not including the freshies i consider frriends though :)) talk with a SLANG!!! WTF?!?!?! wayang-ing has a slang nowadays, just ask freshies. :)
FARTED @ 1:06 AM
10 things i discovered today.
1. I'm taking 5 modules. I have 5 lecturers.
a. One of them looks and talks like he's been squatting on the stools of the coffeeshop with his slippers placed at his feet his entire life.
b. One of them looks like a toad.
c. One of them sounds like a toad that's being squeezed to death. (if you dont know what that sounds like just come to my lecture)
d. One of them is actually comprehensible but looks like he just woke up.
e. One lecturer is OBVIOUSLY from Hainan since he mentioned that place at least 8 times within the hour, even though it's completely out of point. e.g. "hainanese chicken rice is not from Hainan", "In Hainan, on the mountaintop, the water flows from the top of the mountain to the bottom" (so i assumed water flows upwards in other places?) "In Hainan, we use air pressure to vacuum the floor" (remember, this is only applicable to Hainan)
2. I discovered why monotonous is another word for boring. Listening to the same tone for 1 hour could even be introduced as a capital punishment.
3. I discovered what a toad that's being squeezed to death sounds like (thanks to the above mentioned lecturer)
4. I discovered I have 4 hours of lectures on Thursdays, each hour for a different module i take.
5. I discovered that i dont find the butt crack of the guy 2 rows in front of me an enjoyable distraction from the monotonous lecturer that sounds like a toad being squeezed to death.
6. I discovered that my girlfriend's ex-classsmates don't even acknowledge me anymore even though i used to join their classes last sem.
7. I discovered that all my lecturer's (even the comprehensible one) conform to the i-must-speak-in-a-monotone rule.
8. I discovered there's a guy in my lecture who wears a pink jacket over a red top. I imagine he's wearing a tight pink and purple lacy thong and that he's taking next year off so he can go for his op.
9. I discovered (from my lecturer) that Singapore is located to the south of Malaysia and north of Indonesia and that its surrounded by water. I DID NOT know that...
10. I discovered that pudding and yoghurt make quite an interesting combination.
Thursday, August 17, 2006
FARTED @ 10:27 AM
degrees of badness
waking up at 8.30 am to meet a friend. = its ok
waking up at 8.30 am to meet a friend only to find your hp is spoilt = not that bad
waking up at 8.30 am to meet a friend only to find your hp is spoilt and he's late = getting bad
waking up at 8.30 am to meet a friend only to find your hp is spoilt and he's late or maybe even not coming = bad
waking up at 8.30 am to meet a friend only to find your hp is spoilt and he's late or maybe even not coming only at 9.45 am = real bad
waking up at 8.30 am to meet a friend only to find your hp is spoilt and he's late or maybe not even coming only at 9.45 am and that he sent you a msg to tell you he's not your friend anymore = GOOD, then you wouldn't have to wait for him again.
don't worry fl... i forgive you... :)
FARTED @ 9:48 AM
it's a sunny day
yaay! tomororw has come! :) love you baby!
Wednesday, August 16, 2006
FARTED @ 2:23 PM
what can i do?
I cant do anything without thinking of you.
When i listen to music, i think of the time when we were at our favaorite hang out, listening to Wake Me up When Spetember ends and analyzing if what Adik said was true.
When i sleep, i think of how painful it would be to wake and not find you by my side.
When i play games, i think of the time when you went to orisinal.com and played CATS, and kept shouting at the cats and telling them not to move.
When i eat the pudding in my fridge i remember that you are the one who introduced the pudding to me.
When i smoke i think about how you'ld whine and complain when i do.
When i sit at my laptop my screen saver shows your face, trying to act pissed while i make the goat face. Or me giving a fearsome roar while you cant be bothered with what i do.
When i blog, i think of the effort you put in in helping me set up my blog.
When i put on my shoes i think of how you were the boss at acrid and how you'ld reject the names that i came up with.
When i look the time watch i think of how the watch was supposed to be a show to the world of the love we had.
When the FUN song comes on i remember how we used to jump around singing that song together, even over the phone.
When i drink water i remember that you went to IKEA to buy the cups and other stuff with me.
When i clean my room i remember that i cleaned it because i wanted to impress you with my housemaking ability.
When i change my t-shirt i look at the empty space beside my own shirts and wish it was full.
When i cut i remember how much i didnt want you to cut before.
i dont know what to do anymore...
Tuesday, August 15, 2006
FARTED @ 4:41 PM
tomorrow's gonna be a sunny day
Tomorrow will be a sunny day.
Tomorrow there will be no rain.
Tomorrow she will hold my hand.
Tomorrow she will kiss me again.
Tomorrow will be a sunny day.
Tomorrow will be filled with light.
Tomorrow she will smile at me.
Tomorrow she will hug me tight.
Will tomorrow ever come?
I want to go back to yesterday.
FARTED @ 3:43 AM
numb...
Love me.
Hug me.
Hold me.
Cuddle me
Kiss me.
Help me with the pain within.
Hate me.
Burn me.
Bleed me.
Cut me.
Kill me.
Somebody.
Anybody.
Please...
Help me with the pain within.
FARTED @ 2:31 AM
gone to the zoo!!!!
Ok, i know everyone out there was jealous when i posted up my pix of Bali, so now i'm gonna show you something you DONT have to be jealous about. THE ZOO!!! cos you can go down yourself too.
But... before i show you the zoo... I have to say that drinking teh peng before you sleep is a BAD idea cos you DONT SLEEP after drinking that (so does that make my sentence wrong). anyway, i went to drink teh peng at 2am, thinking that i'ld come back and sleep at about 3. Turns out... i went to drink teh peng at 2, and i slept at 7. And i woke up at 9... meaning i went to the zoo as a zombie. I looked so dead the attendant at the zoo tried to kill me just to see if i was alive. According to my research, tea has more CAFFEINE than COFFEE. so here's a tip: do NOT drink tea and expect to sleep!
on to the ZOO!!!
the zoo was GREAT! you'ld never expect staring at animals to be fun but i was pretty amazed by the way the zoo is done up! first of all, the zoo is VERY well organized. It's amazing that so many of their animals are not kept in cages at all, some not even in enclosures! and... those little plates with little bits of info are quite interesting too.
Next, the zoo has some animals that are SOOO endangered there are less than 200 of that kind of species left in THE WORLD (yes, i do mean the area beyond Singapore). How cool is that?!?!? but... our zoo is still SECOND best as compared to the San Diego Zoo. Probably because of the horrible names at certain places. Like GROWie, the giraffe that's adopted by GROW. and the Garden with a View, the garden that has a view. uhmmm.... I beg for some creativity here.
Anyway, the zoo rocks. check out the pix
HERE
Monday, August 14, 2006
FARTED @ 3:02 AM
NEW BLOG SKIN!!!!
FINALLY, i've got a respectable blogskin that doesnt take 75 million years to load or cause you Windowers coms to hang. I found the skin with the help of my baby, and i spent the WHOLE day modifying it and now it's not too bad. yaaay! :) and... i went to the zoo today!!! more on that later, when i get my cam back. so... keep checking!
Friday, August 11, 2006
FARTED @ 12:10 AM
we're going to the zoo!!!!
Daddy's taking us to the zoo tomorrow,
Zoo tomorrow, zoo tomorrow.
Daddy's taking us to the zoo tomorrow,
And we can stay all day.
We're going to the zoo, zoo, zoo;
How about you, you, you?
You can come too, too, too;
We're going to the zoo, zoo,
zoo.
Thursday, August 10, 2006
FARTED @ 2:53 AM
pics of my Bali trip!
ok, i know its been a LONG time since i went to bali, but
HERE are the pix that we took there. :) you can get the same link from the links tab at the bottom too. enjoy!!!
Monday, August 07, 2006
FARTED @ 3:56 AM
Cant Sleep
ok, it is SOOOOO blooodyyyyy HHHHHOOOOOOTTTTTTTTTTT that i cant sleep. I feel like I'm going thru lipo cos i can feel all my fats melting away. Now my bed is stained with the melted blubber. Yuck.... I'll set a reminder to syphon the blubber away and put it in the fridge so that i'll get butter tmr. yummm... sounds tasty. :)
On to the non-sick section. Today me and my baby went to Tampines to buy Stuff for my room. I LOVE the place. When i settle down i'm gonna get a home there. First of all, the identical twin of the slippers i (already) bought at Clementi at $10 costs $5 there. and... the town center and the little off-center centers that come up are designed very well, they've got a great homely feel to it. you can get EVERYTHING you want there: diapers (for the baby), jewellery (for the lady), bras (for the tranny), FOOD (for the hungry, more on this later) and wateva the hell else you need, its there. I know most of you would be thinking... " who cares, most town centers have that anyway..." but what YOU don't know is that.. I DONT care what you think.
Plus, they have this SUPER pizza place where you can get a THREE FOOT long pizza slice (no shit!) from New York Pizza for only FOUR BUCKK$$$$!!!! and the pizza wasn't all that bad either. I woulkd have taken pics of that but i forgot to bring my cam so too bad.
For those of you gym buffs, the gym there is pretty great too (ok, the instructor DID look abit gay with his giant smile and tight fitting shirt and bulging muscles and tight butt etc). LOTS of space to work out and stare at tight butts in motion (for those of you gym buffs who only go to the gym to check that out) and more than enough equipment to work every single muscle in your body a few times over.
And... for those visionaries like me who look to the future, Tampines would be a pretty good place to settle down, probably right up there with Sengkang and Punggol (coming up real fast). More than enough facilities in Tampines for a family to settle down comfortably, well-maintained blocks, swimming pool complete with slides (for the kids, not for the tubby asses like me), good schools in the vicinity, good infrastructure: bus services, mrt etc. Overall, it's thus far my top pick. :)
Ok, I know I might sound like I'm trying to selll my flat in Tampines so that someone out there will buy it, but i'm not. I just like the place. I dont even stay anywhere near Tampines in case you wanna know. :)
The only prob with Tampines is that you'ld better hope your kid doesnt wanna go to university or hope that if he does he doesnt drive your car there...
Saturday, August 05, 2006
FARTED @ 3:09 AM
random thoughts...
I miss my baby even though I onli met her yesterday...
Hacks (the sweet) doesnt taste too good when it's covered in dust.
Just because penguins dont fly doesnt mean they're not birds. (applies to handicaps to humans, thought about this when this lady turned her blind eye onto a blind man when he got on the bus... bee-yatch...)
My Mooks jacket would look alot better if I didnt pay for it.
My laptop would be much more precious to me if a new model didnt come out cheaper. DAMMIT...
Thursday, August 03, 2006
FARTED @ 2:58 PM
nobody loves me...
ok, here's a plea to everyone who reads this blog. If you do read this blog, please tag or something!!!! sobz... nobody tags 'cept my baby. sobz... i feel so... abandoned... haha. GO TAG!!!
Wednesday, August 02, 2006
FARTED @ 5:00 PM
